In Mark 10:2-12 leaders of the Jewish faith approached Jesus with a question. They were not interested in finding out the truth of the matter, but rather, to test Jesus using the topic of Divorce. The question was, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” Notice they didn’t ask, “Is it right or is it best for or beneficial to the children?” No, they asked only is it lawful, with respect to the Mosiac law, hoping Jesus might say something contrary to the words of Moses.
He could have answered in many ways, but Jesus directs them to the Old Testament Book of Genesis saying,. “In the beginning God created human beings male and female”. Two genders.
Secondly, the marriage in the Garden of Eden was between these two created beings and they became “one flesh”. The scriptures then bring the answer home:
“What God has joined together, let no man ( or court) separate.
In essence, Jesus was saying that divorce may be legal under the Law of Moses, but it was never intended by God.
And yet in the United States alone in 2021, the overall divorce rate was 50%. And of those 50%, over 18 million children are now living in single parent homes, perhaps hoping and praying each night for a miracle.
In this song, “Over and Over”, we experience the heartbreak of a little girl crushed by the pain of divorce. She wrestles with her fear that she did something to cause the divorce, as children often do. She expresses her sorrow and remembers her father’s instruction about “a God who never leaves us”. She is confused and dismayed. “If God never leaves us, why is it that Daddys’ do?”
The father who taught his daughter about the steadfast love of God and His faithfulness is the one who leaves his family. Yet it is the little girl who holds to her faith, praying night after night for her father’s return and the family’s restoration.
If your marriage is in trouble and you are considering a divorce, I ask you to simply consider these three Biblical imperatives:
Marriage is not a Long Date.
Marriage is the joining together of two lives in the sight of God, forever. Dates will end but a marriage was designed forever. It is becoming “one flesh” in the sight of God, holy matrimony, with the blessings of God who says: “I will never leave you or forsake you.”
Children are fragile, handle with care.
The emotional damage a child may incur in the wake of a divorce cannot be overstated. Guilt, stress, confusion, fear, a sense of rejection and insecurity are just a few of the traumas which can result from divorce. Children cannot easily process such a destabilizing event, not to mention the economic hardships.
Love isn’t a feeling; it’s a committed choice to do what’s best for someone else.
Yes, we know that bad things happen to good people. There is no time for a discussion on freewill, but people can make bad choices. They ability to choose may be impaired by health issues. But, in most cases, the real issue is that people do not want to make the hard choices. There are biblical grounds for separation and divorce. But you current state of “happiness” isn’t one of them. “All things are possible with God” but all things aren’t easy! Restoration begins with a hard choice: a righteous commitment by both parties to work it out with God.
But…. maybe you’re done. I’m so glad that God was never done with me! Maybe we could all use a little grace right now. You remember the children’s story of David and Goliath don’t you? It was an impossible situation. A boy facing a military giant in battle with only a stone and slingshot. No training as a fighter, no match for the power of the enemy and yet….He defeated the foe! Not in himself, but in the power of the Name of the God of Israel, Yahweh! David faced Goliath speaking these remarkable words,
“You ( Goliath) come against me ( in the natural), with sword and spear. But I come against you in the Name of Yahweh, Elohim. ( in the super-natural) This day you will be defeated!”
David wanted a solution. He was willing to die for it. Why? His God had great value to him. Does your marriage have any value? Fight for it!
Face the real problem as David did; come against the problem, not your spouse, in the Name of Yahweh! He will provide strength and wisdom to put these broken pieces of a marriage back together again. Divorce is still lawful…but it may not be the best choice. Only you can decide.
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